Fran:

NorthernSpy:

 for pain, they gave him Tylenol#3. the caffine sends him just spinning

I suggest next time they prescribe Empracet instead. It's the same as Tylenol #3 but there's no caffeine. (Caffeine may sometimes help increase the transit of the painkiller but it's really only to help keep the real pain killer from knocking you out.)

He's my kid so I will say this but it is only because I know him so well: He either needs to be feeling his pain or knocked out so he doesn't hurt himself more. (Kinda like you would do for a beloved pet) I'm taking note of that medicine Fran thanks for the info. since he has been off the T-3's he has not moved from the couch(this is good)I have him on advil gel for migraine's. every day he asks "can I still go to school this month?" My thoughts are, dear god I hope so! my answer is, if you are well.

---

~The mind is like a parachute, It always works best when it's open~Edna Buchanan~

~Northern Spy~The Apple of my Pie~

~Audrey~

Trace, Anne, Fran, Audrey, Helen and everyone else,

Thank you all so much for your support.  These last 2 weeks have been encouraging.  It is so good to see our girl smile again.  I am worried because she is latching on to an ex-boyfriend who has a ton of issues.  He's not abusive like the last but has a record - is going to jail for 3 months in June for drug charges.  Of course, Emma says he completely "straight" now because he's being drug tested as part of his probation.  Come on, honey, don't go from one crumb to another.  This boy is nice looking but has absolutely nothing going for him.  He's 2 years older than her.  Wait until he's clean and sober for 2 years and then think about it.  AARGH!  She is so afraid of being alone; has to have a boy to latch on to.  My husband is threatening to kick her out of the house if she moves forward with this relationship.  So there is still a ton of stress here.   Yeah, isn't 18 great - NOT!  (She'll be 18 on the 13th - one week to go).  She still refuses to focus on the things she needs to - i.e. graduating from high school but at the same time wants to go to this technical school starting in September.  We visited the school yesterday.  It's private and way.....expensive but has the exact curriculum she wants and all the classes are in the IT field except for 2 or 3 electives.  So...not the typical 4-year college curriculum with the English, History, etc. requirements.  Can she even focus on full time college courses - probably not, but I don't want to shoot her down before she starts.  But....the high school diploma comes first so she better get off her duff and finish - stop focusing on boys and get your __it together!  I went upstairs to her bedroom loft and cleaned up all the trash up there just a little while ago.  Thought I was gonna barf.  Oh my God she's such a slob.

 Trace, I hope Adrian has a good week coming up and Fran, hopefully Kaesye has moved on in the alphabet.     I hope Alex is well and able to start his class next week.

Cheers,

Robin

Hey Robin...you're welcome, anytime! It's just too bad that Emma seems to be going out of the frying pan and into the fire. Your husband does realize that by trying to force her not to see the guy, it will end up entirely opposite, right? I know what it's like to have parents not like a boyfriend...or two! It made him all the more wonderful! Maybe you could encourage more girlfriends time. Let her know it's okay to hang with the girls at your house. But then, if those girls have bf's then Emma's just likely to want to fit in with them and all their boy talk. It's too bad it will take another 10 years or so till she sees the light on the subject of men...they are not the end all, be all! (Maybe you and hubby should pretend to be perfectly okay with the bf, and she'll dump him! Because if mom and dad are okay with it, there MUST be something wrong with him! ). I am SO not looking forward to any of this with Chelsea!

I don't clean Adrian's room anymore. It's pointless. Within a week, it's back to the same disgusting mess. He has so much crap in his room, he has, literally, a 5 ft long, 3 ft wide space to enable him to walk from the door to his bed and back! He can't open his closet or the bottom drawer of his dresser! So there are clothes he owns that I haven't seen in months! He just keeps wearing the same clothes...I wash 'em, he wears 'em, etc etc! I very often tell Adrian that it's okay for his room to be a bit messy, but I draw the line at bio hazard!

Adrian had BETTER have a good week! I'm in no mood for his antics. I completely understand Adrian's AS and the problems that come with it, but man, it is frustrating!

Have a good day, all!

---

Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

Me again...having a bad day so far. I got a phone call from Adrian's EA. Remember the incident with his lock being stolen? Well today he goes to his locker to find that someone has put paint on the bottom of his lock. So he is definitely being targetted. After that he went to cooking class where he was allowed to do his favourite thing, which is making pudding. Except they didn't tell him that they'd changed brands of pudding (no warning of change is not a good thing) and it didn't set as fast as the other one they normally use. So combined with the lock incident, he began to have a meltdown. A female student began yelling at him, telling him that no one wants him there, all he does is cause problems, calling him a piece of sh** and a retard and telling him she was going to punch him in the face!!! AND as this is happening, another student had taken out his cell phone to tape the confrontation!! He was caught by a teacher before he taped anything, thankfully. Can you imagine how Adrian would feel with that on YouTube? And WHY?? Why would anyone WANT to watch that?! But they do. This a bizarre world we're living in. Anyway, Adrian came home early on his own accord, and it has been suggested that he move his locker. Yes, once again, Adrian has to be the one 'punished'. Just like when he was being harrassed walking thru the 'smoke pit' and they told him to walk another route. I told his EA that if he moves his locker and this harrassment continues, that Jim and I are going to want something done. And it WILL continue...is Adrian going to become invisible because he has a different locker?No. These a$$hats will just find out where his new locker is and continue to harrass him. I can't believe Adrian has chosen to spend another semester there. I know I couldn't have taken one DAY of what he's had to put up with, let alone 4 years!! I'm considering having him do his last 2 credits required for graduation by correspondence.

Okay, I'm off to do more pleasant things...fixing up Adrian's old red wagon with Chelsea, on this lovely sunny day.

---

Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

Oh poor Adrian.  Do they have cameras at his school?  I know in Emma's old high school they did.  Unfortunately for her, she was caught on tape decking some girl in the face the second day of school this year; Emma got suspended.  And teenagers are so brutal to each other; I guess compassion for one another is "learned" thing.   Emma has already had a falling out with one of her good buddies because the girl told Emma that she can't come over anymore because she was spending too much time at her place. This friend has her own place.   Of course Emma is devastated.  And, honestly, she was constantly over there, but she is so desparate for friends and so afraid of being alone that she over stayed her welcome.  Now they are "dissing" her.  She is so emotionally unstable, something like this can just put her in a tailspin.  I just talked to her on the phone and she was being belligerent to me because she thinks "I" should be able to fix all her problems.  She needs to grow up and learn to deal with tough situations herself; after all, she caused the current, situation, not me - even though she didn't mean to put herself where she is with these friends.  Sigh!  And...she had a proctor coming to the house today to administer a test and she is blowing her off.  Thank goodness she is a personal friend of mine and knows how Emma's moods jump around.

Gotta get back to the grind here.....just wanted you to know that I'm thinking about you all and we're having a rough few days in Virginia as well.

At least the sun is out today!  Bonus!

Robin 

oh, I am sorry to hear that, Trace. 

I just finished a 12 page paper on Inclusion, Diversity and Multi-Culturalism in Education.  It is so crucial for children to learn empathy and understanding of differences.  I wish all kids could learn in a supportive and inclusive  SAFE environment. 

It is a strange world we live in these days...

I wish I could put a more cohesive thought together, but I literally pulled an all-nighter to get this paper done.  I'm running on Tuesday night's sleep, and coffee...

I hope Adrian and Emma both eventually find the Peace they seek inside them selves...or at least a little bit of peace....

Robin, I  SOooooo know what you mean about the tailspin effect in bi-polar people - the smallest thing can set them of so unreasonably; it is hard to cope with.

At least you both are enjoying beautiful sunny days....I am "enjoying" a blizzard!

---

Helen




I'm goin' Straight to Hell-On-Wheels!

Got a call from the school. They said that the two students in the cooking class have been 'dealt with'. Whatever that means. Jim tried to convince Adrian to stay home tomorrow...nope. He's not going to miss the anime club because of these jerks. God, this kid is my hero. The stuff he has had to endure for all his years in the school system, and he has never backed down, never slunk away, never hid. He is braver than I could ever hope to be. (Oh, and nope Robin, no cameras in the school. Dumb.)

That's unfortunate about Emma and her friend, but yeah, it's easy to over stay your welcome. But why does this friend have to 'dis' her? Immaturity, that's why. When Jim and I were first married, I had a friend that I worked with who was single, and almost every day she would come over to my house after work, and stay long past a decent time to leave. Finally I had to tell her that although I enjoyed her company and her friendship, I had other things to get done after work and I couldn't hang out with her every night. She handled it fine. We were friends, had been since we were 7 years old and still are. There was no need to be mean about it. She just hadn't realized what she was doing. Maybe Emma should email this girl, or write a note or call her and apologize for monopolizing her time and her apartment and explain that it was not her intention to do so and she really didn't realize she was, but she's sorry that she did. Don't know if it would work, but it's worth a shot, if she's interested in keeping the friendship. IMHO tho, if a person is a true friend, they wouldn't do what this girl is doing to Emma simply because she visited a little too often. And quite frankly, she is partly to blame for not saying something to Emma sooner, as I did with my friend.

What a beautiful day it was today! (Sorry Helen!) I was out painting that wagon with Chelsea, and in the garden pulling up the old raspberry bushes . The garden was a mucky mess tho, and Chelsea and I ended up with more mud on our feet than shoes!! But we had fun and that's what counts!

---

Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

I've come to realize that the people that are cruelest to kids/teens are other kids/teens and it sucks royally. They are amazing creatures to be able to put up with it like they do.

---

"I see you in the front row, bouncing up and down, you're ripped and ready for a night downtown." ~ Margarita
What's wrong with a little flirtation?

Monster Tee

My God, I didn't even think of this earlier...that confrontation took place in a kitchen. How very easy it would have been for Adrian's aggressor to pick up a knife or throw hot liquid on him. That really scares me. I've spoken to him about it and told him to be careful of who he deals with and where they are in the kitchen if something happens again. Adrian is very unaware of his surroundings, and when he has a meltdown, he's really on 'cruise control'. Plus, because he would never hurt anyone and couldn't imagine doing it, it doesn't enter his mind that someone might hurt him. What a frightening world...what's it going to be like in a few years when Chelsea's in highschool? **SHUDDER**

---

Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

The camera might have worked in Adrian's favor- proof of what the others were doing to instigate the situation. My kids are still in elementary school, and I teach special ed. at that level as well. There are a couple of kids who, without fail, go out of their way to be kind and partner up with the more obviously disabled kids. Unfortunately, one  of the autistic kids I work with is enjoying the attention that he gets when he is reprimanded for sleeping, banging on the desk, making other noise, always with the response, "I'm just......" He's been just.........."       "  since September. I've had to send him out to the inclusion classroom several times because his noise is too big a distraction for the other students, and they generally don't have the ability or maturity to ignore it. Ah, the universe!!! On a happy note, my son's report card was pretty good...his special ed. teacher called him "mr. Manners" because he's so polite. How many 11 year old boys get that? :)

They put camera's in all our public highschools 2 years ago. The amount of bullying and vandalism has been drastically reduced since they went in. They have also banned cellphones in the schools after they had a 'staged fight' and taped the teachers breaking it up of course the fight didn't make the video just the break up, that featured the teachers in a bad light. it got some national media attention last year I believe I posted somewhere back in this thread on it.

There is nothing more nasty than a child that discriminates against another child and as they are children and some can easily be led to encite a riot atmosphere against an individual. When I hear of some of these incidents I still think of the book we read in school so many years ago anyone remember'The Lord of the Flies'!  

I hope Adrian and Emma find people they can rely on to be there for them as a friend when the going gets tough, and accept them for who they are.

Fingers crossed for Alex he leaves Sunday to go up north to school. It can't be easy to leave all you have ever known and jump into the unknown all by yourself. I really hope this turns out well!

---

~The mind is like a parachute, It always works best when it's open~Edna Buchanan~

~Northern Spy~The Apple of my Pie~

~Audrey~

Well...Emma's 18th birthday was yesterday.  She and 3 of her buddies drove to the local tattoo/piercing parlor and she got her belly button piereced.  (I didn't know about it until she got home.)  She's been begging for this since she was about 15.  She was going to get a tattoo but chickened out - thank the Lord for small favors!!!!  And she's bragging that she can buy cigarettes now.  Yeah, and we can kick your butt out now too - how 'bout that, girlie!!  She is promising to pick up the pace with school - she better, she's running out of time for mom & dad to continue paying tuition. My husband cleared out 28 (yes 28) coke and mondo bottles out of her room yesterday and they were all 3/4 full.  So....we are now going to buy soda in 2-liter bottles.  I'd say none at all but my husband and I both are soda addicts.  

On Saturday I had scheduled a time at our church to have a family portrait done (it's church directory time).  Emma had known about it for about a month.  She REFUSED to go - calling me an idiot, that it was the dumbest thing ever, that she was not going to set one foot in that blankety, blank church.  I couldn't believe it; I was devastated.  So....we had the picture done without her (me, my husband and my 86-year old dad).  How is she going to feel when the current portrait over the fireplace is replaced with the new one and she's not in the picture.  I really wanted to get a couple of shots of her alone too, since I have no Senior picture or cap and gown photo.  It just devastated me and I couldn't believe she could be that mean.  I cried for 2 hours when I could finally had some time to myself Sat. night.

Then yesterday on her birthday she was happy as a clam and sweet as could be.  She wanted her dad to grill steak for her birthday dinner so that's what we did - just the 3 of us - and it was great.  I almost didn't bake her a cake but decided at the last minute not to be vengeful, so I did it.  It's so hard with her - one minute she's my sweet girl and she can turn on a dime and be so nasty and belligerent and purposefully hurtful.  She has made up with her group of friends that she was struggling with last week, so that's a bonus for her but she still has a hard time considering anyone else's feelings other than her own.  She will continue to struggle with relationships unless she grows up soon.

She is supposedly at home right now doing schoolwork.  I've been told that one before!!!!!  We shall see.

Happy Monday everybody!

Robin 

Aahh Robin; I'm with you on the room thing.

Alex left for Liskard Sunday afternoon and I went into his room to clean it out  

THREE bags of garbage later I could see what I was up against! I don't clean my kids rooms, that's their responsibility. I teach them how when they are young, then at 15 its their's to deal with. I just close the door. I have to admit I do poke my head in from time to time and tell them to clean it up or I'm going in with garbage bags, I think Al kinda looked forward to those days.

I had to throw out his book shelf, fermenting ice cream is a smell that lingers. yogurt containers Oi vey! every one I bought I think for the last 6 months I think. soda cans and bottles some empty some not, petrified food One of my bigest rules No food in your rooms!

There was a big blob of goodness knows what on the rug, I tried to clean it, it isn't slimey and gross anymore but it will never be good, I can't remove the rug right now!! The blind was broken I'm not sure how that happened

After most of the afternoon and half of the evening I turned it over to Laura's friend(who has been sleeping on my couch for 3 months) and told her if she finished cleaning it up she could use the room while Alex is gone. Last night I went and bought a new blind for the window, a mirror for the wall that looks so vacant with out a bookshelf fulla crap, and a small area rug to cover the stain, Not looking too bad today!

Did I mention his car is in too bad a shape to make the trip so we let him take my van! I am so not going to be impressed if it looks like his room when and if I ever get it back.

teenagers can't live wit'em and yer not allowed to get rid of 'em! fade into 'and the cat came back'...

---

~The mind is like a parachute, It always works best when it's open~Edna Buchanan~

~Northern Spy~The Apple of my Pie~

~Audrey~

When exactly did watching Teletoon become part of the curiculum? I know I let Kaesye watch a lot of TV and I know that the point is for them to watch it to learn french. She did come home singing the theme song to 6teen in french. But can't you find something a little less cartoony? Even Caillou would be better than Johnny Test.

---

"I see you in the front row, bouncing up and down, you're ripped and ready for a night downtown." ~ Margarita
What's wrong with a little flirtation?

Monster Tee