The OKP is a great place for all of us GBS fans when we want to share our enthusiasm for the band & their music, and just to chat about everyday life or dilemmas. We are all entitled to voice our own opinions here, if we can express ourselves within the 'decency & respect' boundaries of this board's House Rules.

However... there are times when issues are expressed by members whose sole purpose appears to be to 'stir up controversy'. Some are repeat offenders who have been reported to Moderators and Admins, and yet they are allowed to continue posting in the OKP, despite consistently breaking the rules.

I realize that the moderators and admins are active "behind the scenes" if certain posts or problems are reported, but perhaps it's time to post some updates of the "House Rules" (last updated in Sept 2006). Also, perhaps the House Rules page could be incorporated into the sign-up process when new members join the OKP (similar to the process of installing new software, when there are prompts at each page to 'agree' or 'disagree') .   

FYI... Regarding some of the repeat offenders who seem to post in the OKP just for the sake of causing trouble, here are some of the Admins' House Rules from Sept 2006 :

Thank you Melanie, and amen to that.

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Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

The language one needs to be clarified. What one person views as "offensive" ain't necessarily so. I would take great exception at being told that the term "childfree" is verboten, It's how I define myself, Childless just doesn't not describe me and others like me. But some words - should never appear in polite society. and no I am not talking about "swear' words - anyone who knows me knows I don't have an issue with swear words. (really, I don't). I don't even have an issue with kids hearing them - not after working with kids for so long. I've actually learned swear words from the under 10 set. But some folks do have an issue with them, fine and dandy.

 The problem seems to be not the words, but the way in which they are used...we have a few posters who think that nothing should be off limits and "if you don't like it don't respond". Well, that's one way of handling it, but the repeated attempts at starting board wars are not going unnoticed by many and ignoring and\or turning the threads to something else ain't working. When it gets to the point where you( general you here)  are directing people to sites that will only cause hurt and harm...sorry all bets are off. When you (again general you)  are proposing something that smacks of Eugenics - doubly so.

 While I think that ,Yes, I think that a thread for those of us without kids would be a great idea - NO I don't think the one that was started here was anything but an attempt to cause problems. I'd like to see that thread removed. I have reported it. But I was not leaving it there unanswered for the sole reason that I didn't want anyone going to those sites and getting hurt or trying to post and getting the folks there riled up, trust me that would not be pretty.

It seems like some folks have the idea that since they have "freedom of speech" they have no responsibility for what they say - and no one should disagree. With rights, come responsibility and if you (general again) can't shoulder the responsibility of getting answers that you don't like perhaps it's you rather than others who need to sit back and refrain. Just my two cents.  

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Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus
"Take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." E. Wiesel
OKP's Resident B****
Imprudens est draconem vivum de consiliis tuis omittere.
Steet team Leader for NYS, OH and Southern Ontario.

andi:

I would take great exception at being told that the term "childfree" is verboten 

I probably see it as negative, because that's the term I use when I've been in the house for a week and need to get out, 'child free'. It's the term I use when I've had enough and need a break.

As for the swearing issue, I don't like my kids hearing unnecessary swearing in public. I always tell them that it doesn't take a whole lot of brains to swear up a storm, and I don't like hearing it myself. I think it's quite immature and stupid when people swear in public, especially in the presence of children. Andi, you say you've learned some swear words from kids...you know they wouldn't be mine. I have taught my kids not to speak like that (even Adrian, at 17, doesn't swear) and that it takes more intelligence to think of something witty. I just think it shows a lack of class when people feel the need to swear, especially 'sh**' and 'f***' in public. That's my opinion, anyway.

I respect everyone's right to have their say, but that thread went a bit too far. Great, you'd like to talk to other people without kids, but to go on to say that people should have submit to testing before being allowed to have children was ridiculous. As I said there, I have friends with and without kids. We're equal in my mind. I have never said a word when Andi or Columbine come into the disabilities thread...their opinions and ideas are just as valuable as anyone's. To say there should be a thread that only people without children can participate in is wrong, as far as I'm concerned. It would be like me saying that because Andi and Columbine don't have kids, let alone ones with disabilities, then they are to stay out of the disabilities thread. I know I started it as a way for people with special needs to kids to talk, but I have never excluded anyone. And I'd feel the same if someone said, 'hey let's start a thread that's only for people with children'. We are at this site for the love of GBS, which we all share. No one should get left out. BUT, if someone started one of those threads, then that's their option, as it is an option for others to stay out or go in.

I'm rambling now...sorry. Time to go re-do the Christmas tree that the kitten knocked over today! So today the furry kid is getting on my nerves!

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Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

Trace: "I respect everyone's right to have their say, but that thread went a bit too far. Great, you'd like to talk to other people without kids, but to go on to say that people should have submit to testing before being allowed to have children was ridiculous"

 Yes, we all agree on that - that's why folks reported the thread. ;)

 

 

"To say there should be a thread that only people without children can participate in is wrong,  " 

Actually there is a parenting thread and there were posts pulled from it because folks objected to singles in there and there was a single parents thread awhile. But that's ok, folks with out kids should never have a thread of their own, right? We're NOT "second fiddle" either.

 

 Oh and please remember that I got my butt reamed for being in the diabilities thread...but that's OK toO, Yup..those with out kids are  CERTAINLY equal here - I can see that for certain sure.

  

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Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus
"Take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." E. Wiesel
OKP's Resident B****
Imprudens est draconem vivum de consiliis tuis omittere.
Steet team Leader for NYS, OH and Southern Ontario.

I don't see why there shouldn't be a thread for people in various life situations, be they single, married, parents, not parents, whatever.  I don't feel excluded from the Fiddle Diddle thread because I don't play the fiddle, or the Beat the Drum thread cause my Bodhran is little more than a groovy wall ornament.  I don't read or post in those threads, cause they don't interest me, not because I'm not "allowed."  

 

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In the social order, I accept the bottom rung, until the wine is pouring and the Lord commands a song!

There are whole websites & bulletin boards specifically designated ONLY for people in particular life situations.  If people with horses don't want to hear the same repetitive questions from people who don't have horses, or vegetarians don't want to get grilled on the reasons for their dietary choices, they can go to a Horse Owners' or a Vegetarians' web board.  People who only like hip-hop probably wouldn't hang around here much.  Most times it sorts itself out.

I actually think that people are handling the situation that spawned this inquiry incredibly well. Cheers!

Love, Columbine
 

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I didn't know there was a parenting thread. Oops. I thought about my post after leaving the computer and realized that 'wrong' was the wrong term to use. I guess what I meant was excluding people was wrong. As for  Andi getting her butt reamed 'for being in the disabilities thread', that is not true. That was about a conflict between her and another okp member that got way too personal. It was definitely NOT because she was simply in the disabilites thread. I don't appreciate your tone in your last line, Andi...I believe it infers that I am lying when I say that we are all equal. But you see it however you wish, you always do.

And now I am done here, and in the other thread causing controversy. There are way better things to do than to let the person who started the other thread sit back and laugh at the problems she's caused. And there are much friendlier threads to post in, which I believe we're all welcome in.

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Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

" As for  Andi getting her butt reamed 'for being in the disabilities thread', that is not true. That was about a conflict between her and another okp member that got way too personal. It was definitely NOT because she was simply in the disabilites thread. I don't appreciate your tone in your last line, Andi...I believe it infers that I am lying when I say that we are all equal. But you see it however you wish, you always do."

 

Actually it is true. and the post were left the. I got attacked for stating an opinion in that thread.  And frankly there are many posts around here that give the impression that folk with out kids are less that kids or those with them...just watch the threads about kids at concerts and how they are to be treated - for instance. Yeah, I see thing as I see them, just as everyone else here does. But that's ok. There's only one "right way to feel." O know that - and I have no problem bucking it either.

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Draco Dormiens Nunquam Titillandus
"Take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented." E. Wiesel
OKP's Resident B****
Imprudens est draconem vivum de consiliis tuis omittere.
Steet team Leader for NYS, OH and Southern Ontario.

Regardless of how you remember it, which is not how anyone else does, it was one problem a year ago...let it go. I have managed to not be holding it against you a year later that you took your problem with this other person out on me.

Boy, Margaritavile, must be laughing herself silly.

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Some people shine like a star in the first moment. Others keep their light hidden until they are ready to show us.

The basic topic could have made an interesting general discussion ... i.e. "For those of you who don't have any children, do you feel that the holiday season focuses primarily on kids & families ? If you don't have kids, what are your own traditions and plans for celebrating Christmas?" . But mentioning "the responsible choice Not the Selfish Choice Not to Parent ", and suggesting that all potential parents should be registered and investigated, sure makes it seem like the topic was raised specifically to create trouble. Looks like she succeeded... again... with apparently no consequences... again.

As I mentioned before, in my opinion I feel that the House Rules need to be enforced to deal with the repeat offenders. The Admins' House Rules forum could benefit this chat board by being updated with clearer & more specific guidelines of social respect and decency. My reference to the "language" section was intended as a comment regarding the deliberate use of words & phrases designed to provoke trouble ("responsible choice not selfish choice" etc).

Most OKP members abide by the rules, but it only takes a few troublemakers to poison the atmosphere. It will be interesting to hear the Admins' comments regarding these issues ...

Cheers,

Melanie

And then there is BOB's opinion of the OKP and it's content (from the comments to his own Sountrack):

"As for the chatroom - well, it exists because fans want it. We do not monitor it at all. We could care less if people critiscize us or our music. The only rules we have asked to be enforced is that no posts should discuss the band's private lives, and that posts which personally attack other fans will be deleted.

After that, the discussion goes where it goes.

December 2, 2007 6:11 AM "

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Helen




I'm goin' Straight to Hell-On-Wheels!